Friday, August 12, 2011

She Broke Me


And You Think This looks BAD....This part of my day was a picnic. 
Having Scrappy sit on my face with his Butt on my nose was the highlight.

 Ten minutes later, I look like this.  My Vickie Broke Me.  She broke my nose and bruised my eye.  She scarred me for life....My name will now be SCAR FACE.   Yep, the pretty days are gone and it all started with a game of "Throw the Ball My Vickie, come on, Throw it, Throw it."  

"Yes Yes, good throw."

Now I will run full speed in the directions My Vickie threw it and I will abandon all things except my keen desire to capture the red flying ball

Oh Crap!!! A FENCE

 Interestingly enough and thankfully, My Vickie didn't see the damage she had caused until we were at our weekly fun date with my girls and Murhpy.  When we got out of the car is the first time she noticed how she had damaged my Handsome face for all time.

Luckily she decided we could finish our play time with the girls and Murphy but she immediatly got on the cell phone and called the doctor to see if he could see me.

My Vickie:  "Hi Misty, Is Dr. Doughty In"

Misty:   "Why yes he is Vickie, is there something we can do for you"

My Vickie:   "I think I broke my dog"

Misty:     Laughing sounds coming over the phone lines

My Vickie:   "Stop it, I didn't mean to break him, I just did:

So the conversation went.  Through Misty's laughter, My Vickie and her made an appointment for me as soon as she could get me there.

But first.......I MUST SWIM
 Isn't ANNIE lovely when she is all wet?
 And it is hard for me to tell, but this is Annie or Baci....I'm really not sure.

And off to the vets I go.
 Luckily my nose is not broken but I have bruised up my eye pretty good.  So Dr. Doughty told My Vickie to put a frozen steak on it as a cold pack.  Well we don't have frozen steak but we did have some salmon. 
 So she hooked that thing to my head and made me sit quietly while she "Cold Packed" my injury.  I would much rather eat the stuff, but that was not to be.
 Finally, it felt so good that I just went to sleep. 
So, unless My Vickie is willing to pay for plastic surgery, I may be scarred for the rest of my life.  I am not sure if that is cool or sad.  Right now it looks sad, but who knows, after it heals, It may make me look Totally cool for the ladies.   I hear that scars are sexy.  Whatever that means.

Well I am off for another cold pack sleep.  Take care everyone and watch out for those fences.

Love
Bert

46 comments:

Sara said...

Chicks dig scars.

Hope you don't smell too fishy.

The Ryans said...

Awe Bert you are still one handsome devil and I agree chicks dig scars. Take it easy for a couple of days.
XO Cleo & Gus

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

Oh dear, poor Bert. But we all think scars add character - so no sweat. Hope you aren't feeling too uncomfortable. Rest well, pal.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

KEY WEST COLLIES said...

We have heard many times, "Chicks dig scars." You will have all the girl dogs by you wanting a date now.


Essex & Deacon

STELLA from Down Under said...

Oh poor Bert. I'm sending you lots of puppy kisses to make it better. I don't know why your scars would make me want to dig. Mum says no digging in the garden so I will have to ask around to find out about all this business. xxxxxxx No worries, and love, Stella

Sagira said...

Oh no! I sure hope your eye feels better soon my friend.

♥I am Holly♥ said...

Bert, you will always be very handsome! We are sorry you got hurt though. We bet you get to eat a steak!!!! Get well sweetie!! Lots of love, Debbie & Holly

K-Koira said...

Awww, the fur'll grow back. Koira loses big chunks all the time when playing (miss tender skin herself) and has no scars to speak of.

Boondocks and The Love Shack Pack said...

Dude, you are going to have the pirate looking going on! Watch out Johnny Depp!!

AROOOOF!
Boondocks & The Love Shack Pack

Amber DaWeenie said...

Oh Bert.....My teenie weenie heart is breaking over your poor scar face. Butt....tink of it dis way.....it makes you unique (or is dat u-nicked). Anyway, I nose you would radder eat dat cold pack den have it sticking to your nose!

Have a nice weekend!

Finn said...

Scars are so sexy! I am so sorry you had a bad day there but soon you'll be on the mend. Watch out for those fences!

CreekHiker / HollysFolly said...

You poor Bert!! Make Miss Vickie feel good and guilty and maybe you'll get some of that salmon!

Leontien said...

ohhh that looked soo sad! I hope you feel better soon! And yes chicks dig scars! haha (had to laugh pretty hard about that one!)

The salmon was a good replacement!

Hope you have a good weekend!
Leontien

bichonpawz said...

Oh! We are so sorry to hear you are injured! Hope you are soon on the mend and having salmon as a snack! Xoxo Chloe and LadyBug

Meeka said...

I bet you were looking at Annie and got distracted and that is how you hit the fence.
Take it easy.

Frankie Furter said...

OUCH... Bert that looks really PAINFUL.. TERRIBLE ... HORRID..
(Will that be enough of those words to put Your Vickie on a big enough GUILT TRIP to poach up that sammin stuffs fur you to REALLY enjoy?? WHAT?? Oh, ok.. here are a couple extras fur good measure.
It looks DISGUSTING.. and she nearly BLINDED YOU..

PeeS.. next to a nice TAT.. girrls dig Scars the mostest.

You can make up a super story about how you did battle with an entire HERD of Vicious SQUIRRELS. The wimmen love those kinda stories. I'm just sayin, buddy.

Droopy, Smiley, and Kayah said...

Oh Bert! We can't believe your Vickie would make you run into a fence and damage your beautiful face like that! Let her ice your face and we know you'll heal up just like new! Just don't mess with it!

Slobbers,
The CheeseHounds

Mack and Murph said...

Bummer Bert! Your Vickie really owes you this time. Milk it for all its worth!

But hey, what doesn't kill ya- makes you stronger. And it adds character. Feel better soon!

Keisha said...

Awwww, u sweetheart! I hope u feel better soon. :)

verobirdie said...

Poor you. It is a good thing you did not break your nose. I hope your eye will be better soon.

Kolchak Puggle said...

Awwwwww. You poor thing! How dare your Vicki break you!

Maggie and Mitch said...

You'll always be handsome to us, Bert, no matter how many scars you have!
We hope you get to eat that salmon!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Roo said...

Oh my Bert! You had Mom flashin back to George the Monkey "Look out for that treeeeeee! Whack." Glad your nose isn't broken. Never heard of a salmon pack before BOL! Scar or no scar you will always be one handsome dude :D

Waggin at ya,
Roo

Mango said...

Wow, Bert, I think you can hold that over your Vickie's head for a long time to come...

Your Vickie: "Bert, I don't really feel like playing right now."

You: "Sure, whatever, I know how much you hate me ever since you tried to break me. I'll just phone the animal cops and show them my scars."

Hehehe.

Slobbers,
mango

Sarge said...

Hey Bert!
Wow, I'm (nearly) speechless! I can't believe how brave and strong you are! That's what the woo doggies will be excited about. Tell 'em "nope, I didn't cry or anything...didn't hurt, didn't hurt!" I agree that you should get to eat that salmon for being one rough-and-tough dog! No sissy stuff in you. The woo dogs will swoon for the rugged look!
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, COP

Sarge said...

Hey Again Bert!
Wow, my Dad says anytime someone asks you about it, just say: "Yeah, you should see the other guy!!" BWAR HAR HAR
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, COP

Whisppy said...

Oh dear. Poor Bert. That mark looks pretty awful but I hope it heals over nicely and doesn't leave a scar.

Do you get to eat the salmon once it's thawed? :D

houndstooth said...

Hey Bert, I want you to know that there's hope! Last November, Morgan and I were running together at the dog park. Morgan was watching me and hoping to catch me, but she wasn't looking where she was going. She ran right into a tree and made a mark just like yours under her eye. A month later, you couldn't even tell, so I think you might be alright if you don't pick the scab.

Bunny

Sierra Rose said...

Oh Bert!! Fun swimmin' times, but oh that ouchie! It will add character for sure, but pal, it looks like a stinger! Careful...
Must say...salmon ice packs! Now that's some tasty icing.

Sweet hugs,
Sierra Rose

George the Lad said...

Bert, that looks sore bud, its early days you might not have a scar thats to bad, paws crossed for you, tell mom when the fish defrosts it should be for you ;)
Have a good week and take it easy.
See Yea George xxx

Tom, Tama-Chan, Sei-Chan, Bibi-Chan, Vidock said...

Oh poor Bert! And we can imagine how terrible Vickie must feel. Take comfort in this, though: a little bit of a scar is considered quite manly, you know!

Woofs,
Tommy

RYKER said...

well Burt, it's not like she threw you into the fence. Who broke who and are you trying to milk this a bit...no breaks. I think you are going to heal up just fine and be just as handsome as ever. Thank goodness you didn't poke your eye out!!!
If you run out of salmon frozen peas work good too.
Speaking of disfigurements, I bit my tongue and have flap sticking up on it. I will have to have mom try and get a shot of it.
You rest and get better now, I'll be thinking good healing thoughts and send them your way!

Shawnee the Shepherd said...

Oh my, I hope My Vickie is keeping that evil kitteh away from you, I mean with the fishies attached to your eyeball and all... You would be a sitting fishie (sorta like a sitting duck). Could be furry bad news indeed. But hey, battles scars do be a big turn on fur us laydee dogs. Wowser!

Sugar the Golden Retriever said...

Woof! Woof! Golden Hello! Passing by to say Lots of Golden Thanks for your Barkday Wishes. I had a PAWSOME 10th Barkday! Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

Oh NO! Love your ice pack. Sending you Golden Healing thoughts on your ouchie. Golden LOVE n Woofs

Khyra And Sometimes Her Mom said...

I think my Golden Khousins are onboard!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra

Scout 'n Freyja said...

Bert, your hair will grow back, we're pretty sure 'cause long ago the same thing happened to another of our momma's doggies. It took a while but the hair reappeared and Prince (momma's doggy) was just as handsome as ever.

Curt Rogers said...

Bert, if it makes you feel any better, the other evening I was sitting on my patio writing about Duncan when a mosquito crawled onto my eyelid and bit it. Normally the little buggers leave me alone and I don't have any problems, but not this one. This one got my eyelid but paid for it with his life. I wasn't even really aware of it until my eye started to thump up in time with my heartbeat. I looked in the mirror and saw the bruise getting bigger and bigger until finally it looked exactly like your eye. In fact, it's still bruised. My sister joked that it looks like I've gone 80s retro and have started wearing purple eyeliner.

Anyway, you're not alone out there. And you're still handsome as heck so don't fret too much.

rottrover said...

Oh Bert! We hope you feel better; but we agree with the Mango - milk it for all it's worth, dude.

MAXMOM IN SOUTH AFRICA said...

Hey there Bert...
Geesh, I am so sorry to hear about your fight with the fence. Ouch! Big-time Ouch!
I hope you don't feel too poorly and that you will get better soon.
Lotsalicks
TOBY IN SOUTH AFRICA

The Thundering Herd said...

Ouch. Ok, the girl dogs will like the scars, but they will LOVE the salmon cologne.

My hu-dad was reminded of a full speed head on collission between Rusty and another dog that gave Rusty a bloody nose. Tossed.

browndogcbr said...

Hi Bert!

My paws are crossed that you're feeling better soon! Like when you wake up from your next nap!

My Humans keep those quick freeze packs around and in the car for emergencies, human or animal. They also keep those freeze wraps from the hospital pharmacy in the freezer for my Humans headaches.

Trust me, all these things are good to have around in case of misplaced fences and humans who can't throw straight!

Y'all come back now,
Hawk aka BrownDog

Bailey Be Good! said...

Oh no, Bert! I'm so sorry you have a boo boo! I hope you're not hurting too much. I think you'll be just as handsome no matter what scar you're left with. :)

Woofs & hugs <3,

~Bailey (Yep, I'm a girl!)

Elizabeth said...

Oh, dear! Hope your cold packs are working, Bert (and that you aren't left with a big scar - no matter how cool it might be). :) (We shamefully giggled at Scrappy's butt on your nose).

Jon Farleigh and Dewi

Georgia Peach said...

Hey Bert,

It gives you some tough guy character like Charles Bronson or Clint Eastwood. Wear it with pride!!!

2browndawgs said...

Oh no Bert! But Honorable scars shall not be penalized. Yep it says it right there in the Chessie breed standard. If the other Goldens don't appreciate your honorable scar, (chasing a ball is just as honorable as fetching a duck), we will adopt you as one of us!

the 2 brown dawgs

Jan's Funny Farm said...

Oh, Bert, we're glad you didn't break your face but sad you banged it up so bad. That must hurt. But not enough to miss your play date.