Friday, December 9, 2011

WARNING Frankie Do Not Read

Frankie, let this be a warning....You probably don't want to read this post as it will most likely Give You NIGHTMARES.

But before I get to the Nightmare
My Vickie and I went to the mail box the other day.  I get to go every day now cause I, yes Me, am getting a lot of mail.  Yeah......I am getting Christmas Cards.  Me....Isn't that great.

Poor Vickie, she has only got two Christmas Cards but I have a gazillion.  Way more than My Vickie......
Anyway, Today, not only did I get some Christmas Cards but I GOT A PACKAGE.  Yep, just for me.  Addressed to me.  ME.

My Vickie says it is a Christmas Gift and I can't open it until Christmas.  Gosh....How far away is Christmas.  I feel like I have been already waitning FOREVER.

This much I do know... My dear friend Lola sent it to me so I want to thank Lola and Hilary right now.  Even if I have to wait, you shouldnt have to wait to hear THANK YOU  THANK YOU   THANK YOU from me.
Now for the reason I am sleeping with one eye open.  Can you guess?  Yep, you got it.....Devil Cat is on the rampage.....He is in a whole different world of nasty lately.  And No One Knows Why.
He has even taken control of my One and Only Big Red Ball.   He won't even let My Vickie get at it. 
Sometimes when he looks at me with this expression, I fear, if I fall asleep, he may just kill and eat me.


Beleive me when I tell you, he wasn't asking to give me a hug.

Bless My Vickie's heart, she just told me that she would protect me while I get a little nap so I am off to dream land for a bit.  I am so tired and so in need of a few hours of sleep without fearing for my life.

I think I'll dream of.........

Charlotte
Ah Yes,  I am on vacation in Austria with Sweet Charlotte, and it is beautiful.
Wow, I think I like Austria.  It is a beautiful place plus it has Charlotte.  Yes it is just a dream, but the best part about it is.........
ALLRED ISN'T HERE.....


ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

25 comments:

Prancer Pie said...

Um, that kitteh does haf a pretty serious look on his face. You look adorable sleeping, Bert. Haf a pawsome weekend.

Tessa the Maltese said...

Ah Bert I am fury sorry for you. It sounds to me like even your Vickie is afraid of Allred.

Heck, I is fury afraid of HIM and I only gots to look at his picture!

Have you thought bout stickin HIM in a box and mailin him to Alaska?

Well, I is at least happy that your Vickie had your back and you got a pawsome nap and dreamed of you Girl!

HIDE! Just HIDE!

woos, Tessa

MAXMOM IN SOUTH AFRICA said...

Hey there Bert,
That certainly looks like a ferocious kitty. Allred looks like she/he has the credentials to join a pride of lions..but a pretty majestic kitty nevertheless. I'm not surprised you are quivering in your furs....
mmm...did Allred get any Christmas cards, I wonder? One can't win friends and influence people like that, BOL!
I think you are a very sweet poochy.
Sending lots of love to your special family.
MAXMOM IN SOUTH AFRICA

Rubie said...

Boy Bert - I couldn't relax with a cat like that around me....how do you do it?? He looks MEAN and NASTY!!

Tail Wuggles, Rubie

Finn said...

Looks like a beautiful place for a dream with your gal! You look so cute dozing off!

Reilly / Denny Cowspotdogs said...

Hmmmm maybe Allred is a wee bit jealous that he isn't getting any mail and gifts. You better watch out Bert - he might decide to take those and protect them too. What a wonderful dream you had......

Roo said...

Ha! Good thing you warned Frankie Bert BOL! I know you live with Allred and have a much better sense about him butt I gotta tell ya pal, I'm really startin to take a shine to the feisty guy :) Lot of spunk he has that Allred :D

Glad you got a good rest in and had a lovely dream of Austria :)

Waggin at ya,
Roo

Shawnee the Shepherd said...

OMD I could see Allred's SHARP SKEERY DAGGER NAILS in that one pikshure. They could rip you WIDE OPEN and I know this fur a fact to be true. Fur sure do not let Frankie see that one.

Tom, Tama-Chan, Sei-Chan, Bibi-Chan, Gen-Chan, Vidock said...

Ahem, Bert..... I never, EVER took you for one but are you being a little bit of a "wuss"???????

Woofs,
Tommy-The-Cat-Lover

Curt Rogers said...

I have one word for you, Bert:

Catnip.

Have Vickie get you some today and you'll be able to get your ball back in no time. And maybe even take control of the entire place!

Trust me.

GOOSE said...

Bert Buddy,
I think what you and I need to do is to take Mr. Allred on a walk with us. You know, include him in our fun. Maybe he just wants a nice loooong walk.
Yep I think that's what we should do.
I hope your dream was not cut short.
Blessings,
Goose

Frankie Furter said...

OMD OMD.. if you and Goose take ... HIM ... fur a walk PLEASE do NOT walk EAST.
THANKS fur the WARNING.... I ran speedy quick and put on my Allred Filtering Glasses... so I could look at everythingy... and HE.. didn't show up. THANK DAWGNESS.

I do believe that HE has the GRINCH in him. Yes I DO. In FACT he makes the GRINCH seem pawsitively Pleasant.
My mom and dad only have 4 cards... Ernie and I have about 87 bazillion.
Sooooo now... the big question... How many Cards has ALLRED received???
Ok... I'm gonna take my Allred Filtering Glasses off now. THANKS AGAIN... I WILL be able to sleep tonight. WHEW.

H Ski said...

Glad you received the package. Don't worry Christmas will be here before you know and you will get to open the package. I hope you like everything.

The Army of Four said...

Wow, that's some nice dream, buddy Bert! About Allred, though .. he can't be THAT bad, can he? I mean... maybe if you remind him that Santa is watching??
Play bows,
Zim

Whisppy said...

Gulp. We would sleep with both eyes opened...Allred looks scary! We hope you manage to get enough rest to enjoy your weekend.

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

Wowzers, that Allred is starting to scare us too - look at those fangs and claws!!! You are so lucky you have Your Vickie to protect you while you have those sweet dreams of Charlotte.

Happy Saturday.

Woos ~ Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

Charlotte said...

oh my love - I wish you get at Christmas a golden shiny suit of armor to protect you from these scary cat. and I will write a threatening letter to allred - I'll find him all over the world if he only tries to disturb your dreaming of me.
I love you more than words can say
Yours Charlotte

K9 Katastrophie said...

Hi Bert! You look so cute sleeping with 1 open!

Licks,
Ruthie

2browndawgs said...

Allred sure has some gigantic paws!

the 2 brown dawgs

Fiona, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

We've learned to not mess with kittehs - in fact, we prefer to keep As Far Away As Possible. You never know when they're going to go all psycho-kitteh on you! (BTW... I don't think we have your mailing address... can you send it to Mom? gretaskiAThotmailDOTcom Thanks!)

*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

Meeka said...

My guess is Allred is unhappy that he's not getting any xmas cards and that's the reason he's been acting all crazy. Go tell him some of those cards are for him and he'll start to be nice to you.

Amber DaWeenie said...

Ooooh...if looks could kill! Just look at Allred. He looks really mad about something. Yes, Bert, you better watch your back!

:o)

snoopy@snoopysdogblog said...

Bert,

As much as I'd love to have a Cat as a friend I can sure see it may not always work out how I imagine it in my dreams Dude!!

Allred, the Devil Cat, sure looks like he's got it in for you buddy - I can see why you're dreaming of Austria, but your Vickie isn't in your picture and I know you'd miss her!! Sometimes it's best to face your fears!! Maybe he's kinda jealous of all the mail you're getting?

Maybe send him a Christmas Card and it will cheer him up? I dunno, or is he a lost cause? I'm glad your Vickie is gonna protect you while you get some sleep.....

Sweet Dreams my friend,

Your pal Snoopy :)

Sagira said...

Do you need me to come take care of that kitty for you? I like to chase them. :)

Your girl sure is cute. :)

KB said...

I loved the Christmas card part of the post... but that Allred is a danger to humanity and all canines! His photos belong in a haunted house. Be careful Bert. Be very careful!